Little ... foodie problems

Hey there baby,

I'm not sure why you seem to hate everything with any flavor.

I'm close to giving up on cooking.

And well ,eating is interesting too.
Apparently you are not a fan of mexican rice.

Or of Asparagus or porkchops.

We didn't last long on either of those meals.

Apparently the peanut butter and banana snack was icky too.

You are going to be picky aren't you?

Thanks for keeping it outside of work.

They already think I'm weird with the copious amounts of bathroom trips.

I thought that was supposed to happen later...

I don't think you'd stay a secret much longer at work even if I wanted you to.

But I'd prefer it if we keep the upchucking to ourselves.

No one needs to hear/deal with that.

Plus it's comical to gross out papa.

He handles it well. 

I think I just need an outlet sometimes. 

I tell him all my woes.

And you too...even if you don't respond

Honestly, neither does papa. He just say's "that's nice"

and moves on.

Pregnancy is no vacation.

But I venture to guess it's going to be easier than parenthood.

So I should count my blessings right?

I guess I can go bland and cold for a while. 

If this were a diet thing I'd never last,

but knowing it's for you gives me far more motivation.
Only for you.

I love you, you sweet thing.

Grow Strong.

Little.....blessings

Hey Baby,

So I wanted to tell you that although I complain

about the sickness

the pubescent teenager acne

the bloating

the expense of it all.

I think you are a blessing.

Truly and honestly I am so thankful for you.

You were a surprise that's for sure.

But when I think of the miracle that you are I can't help but feel in awe.

In awe that the Creator of the universe is forming you within me.

In awe by how many things have to go exactly right just for you to come into being.

I think that loving you gives me a better understanding of love.

I don't even know you yet and I love you.

I desire your affection and I have the highest hopes for you.

In my desires for you I think of Christ's love for me.

When I reject Jesus and sin against him

he loves me.

When I did not know him he knew and cared for me.

He has high hopes for my future and desires for me to love him so.

I can't tell you that I'll be able to always love you like that

But I can guarantee God feels that way about you even now.

You are precious to him, just as you are to papa and I.

So I am sorry for the complaints.

I'm still learning to be like Jesus.

Little...let's talk about papa.

Hey Baby,

I just wanted to take today to tell you about your papa.

It's probably fairly obvious that I love him

but I wanted to tell you a bit about him.

Your daddy and mum have been good friends ever since they met

but it's been a relatively short while since they grew to love each other.

Mum was silly and interested in things other than your papa when they met.

However he is such a good man that when momma fell for him she fell hard.

We dated for 11 months got engaged and then married 6 months later 

and well then boom, you happened.

We are still learning how to love each other well.

But papa is the best at it.

He doesn't even know it.

It's the little things.

Like the way he picks up after me when I'm lazy, and exhausted from making you haha.

Or how today he ran around getting everything I needed at the store 

while I just waited not so patiently in line.

Or how he waited so patiently when I said no the first two times he asked me on a date.

Your papa is pretty patient.

Not to mention persistent.

But that worked out well for the two of us now didn't it?

He tells me I'm beautiful.

Even when I'm crying for no reason because you make my hormones CRAZY.

He doesn't complain when I make dinner and then throw it out

because suddenly it's the most disgusting thing ever and I can't stand to look at it.

I just can't wait for you to meet him.

I can't wait to observe his love for you.

I'm crazy about you already 

but I know when you get here your papa will be over the moon.

Grow Strong Baby.

Dear little...

Hey baby,

So you are no longer a secret.

I think the families are pretty excited over you.

I know mum and dad are.

Mommy is sick today so we get to spend some down time in bed drinking concoctions

and eating soup to get better.

Be safe baby, be healthy.

Uncle Joshua is pretty excited about you.

He liked the way we told him you were coming.

Grandma and Grandpa Stelzer are pretty happy too.

You're their first grandchild.

But you won't be alone.

You have LOTS of cousins to meet.

One is coming very soon.

We're excited to meet him too.

He'll only be about 7 months older than you.

I bet you two will be friends.

Mommy had her student tell the teachers she has you in her tummy.

It was pretty funny, because they didn't believe him right away.

I love showing people your picture.

I love reliving the moment I first saw you do your acrobatics.

I can't wait to feel you .

Grow strong baby.

See you in a few months.

Happy Valentines Day little

Hey baby,

Happy Valentines day.

Don't worry about missing out on this one

We will celebrate it next year too.

I wish you were hear to snuggle and kiss.

Also I take back what I said last time

You know about thanking you for not giving me morning sickness...

It was a not so well received Valentines gift

But what can a mommy do?

You toss your cookies and move on

It was literally a cookie too (you've already got a sense of humor)

Your daddy and I are going to spend our last Valentines day alone by baking cookies 

Mum will pass on eating them today I think

Perhaps we'll start this as a tradition for you though

Anyway, We love you lots

And are so happy to have you little valentine

To our little

Hey there baby

I can't begin to fully express the love your papa and I already have for you.

 I admit that I also have daily fears over you as well.

 I hope you are growing strong.

 Yesterday your mum and dad went to their first doctors appointment.

 I saw you for the first time.

 My heart was bursting with joy when I saw your tiny legs kicking, and your heart all a flutter. 

The nurses loved that you looked like a key in one of your pictures.

 They say we should incorporate it into your name. 

Looks like I swallowed a key

We will see about that.

 Your little nose is so cute, but be prepared that you're bound to have a honker like mommy and daddy.

 I'm glad to know your heart is beating strong.

167BPM

 I didn't think we'd be able to hear it since you decided to try and hide for that part.

 I think about you every single day and I pray for you to be healthy.

 I know that no matter what, you are our gift from God and that he loves you even more than we can. 

I can't wait for you to get to know him.

I hope that your heart follows Christ's.

I'm scared to lead you in that.

But you belong to him, so I will trust in his plan.

We're telling your grandparents, aunts, and uncles on Sunday.

I know they will love you too.

Mum is not enjoying keeping you a secret.

Dad is still trying to come to the realization that you are really in my tummy.

You will be let down by us all your life.

We will undoubtedly make mistakes.

We aren't perfect, but we have known perfection.

His name is Jesus.
 And He will make everything new in it's time.

So forgive us when we fail.

And know that we desire to love you like Christ does.

Oh and a few more things...

Thank you for letting me avoid morning sickness

Even though Cheerios smell like vomit

Blessing, Fears, and Futures

The Lord truly blessed Daka and I with one of the longest honeymoons. We had 7days 8 nights in Italy, 1.5 weeks for Christmas and new years, and then 3 extra snow days. Since we said "I do" we had 26 days of togetherness. I don't think we spent more than 2 hours apart. I felt so lucky. I feel so lucky. I am blessed. And now I know why. I think that time together was allowing us to prepare for what is coming next.

January 5th I took my first pregnancy test ever. When the first pink line appeared I had mixed feelings both sad at the thought we might not be pregnant and happy that we'd have a little more time. A few moments later a faint second line on the test appeared. I was pregnant. More fear than anything else invaded my body. We were just married 3 weeks before. How could we have a honeymoon baby? We took precautions. We wanted to wait a year. So we did some research to see if the second line indeed indicated I was pregnant. Sure enough it did. Two days later, still in denial, we bought a digital test. Not even 3 minutes passed and it already read pregnant. This time I had had a few days to get used to the idea and was able to be happy about it.

I have wanted to be a mother my whole life. I mothered my dolls as a child. I mothered my friends during play time as a girl. I wanted, and still do want, to be a mom. But I chose a career when it seemed like that was the next best thing to do. I love my job don't get me wrong but the thought of having to be both a career woman and mother frighten me. Financially we will have to both have jobs until we can dig ourselves out of school debt. That fact saddens me some. I'm not really sure why God timed things this way. But I do trust him. Daka has to remind me to trust him, but I do. God is our provider. He sustains my very life. If he ordained that we would have a child this quickly than how can I feel anything but blessed.

So September baby I am thrilled to meet you. I'm going to be your mum and you have a pretty stellar dad. We love you already and we are thankful for you.

Come what may, Lord we will trust you.