Home Sweet Apartment

Hey there Micaiah,

So papa and I have been living in our apartment since Tuesday.

And slowly but surely things are coming together.

It's weird to think that this will be your first home.

I'm excited to begin getting things ready for you.

But unfortunately that means purchases. 

And money. Which is stretched a little thin at the moment.

So things will progress more slowly.

But we will get there.

Plus how much could you really need at first? 

I'm still stressing about the pending status of my insurance.

I've called all of these number a dozen times over.

We start making payments for care next week

and have to have your whole birth paid for in 3 weeks.

YIKES.

Fortunately, if we do get insurance before you arrive we will be reimbursed.

But still it's a little scary.

Your daddy has a second interview scheduled for next week Monday.

Hopefully things go well in that department.

But as much as I gripe and groan about money...

We truly are well cared for.

I may not have many of my wants

but I have everything I need.

And that's all by God's goodness and grace.
Like this apartment.
Smaller than we had hoped for but we have a place to live.

He gave us this savings.

He provides for us daily.

Yes we need to be good stewards, but he knows our needs.

Things never have worked out for me in the way I plan them in my head

so I don't know why I always expect the Lord to follow MY plan.

For now I have to daily trust him.

I haven't been doing that so well lately.

When we spend money I panic.

I panic about the future that isn't promised to me.

Baby boy, I hope there comes a tomorrow

and a day after

and after that

till I meet you.

But even you aren't promised to me.

I'm fortunate to get to love and care for you today.

So I'm going to continue to ask Jesus for grace to live each day as it's own day.

And trust that he knows exactly what he is doing.

Grow Strong Baby

So Very Pregnant

Hey there Micaiah,

So today I feel very pregnant.

I'm going through the whole 1st trimester nausea again.

Minimal episode of upchucking this trimester though.

Still happens but fortunately not like before.

I took a two hour nap this afternoon.

Wow what a lump I am.

I could have slept even longer too!

You have learned this new trick

Where you pinch a nerve in my leg

And cause the entire thing to go numb.

Thats fun.

*walk walk walk, searing pain/numbness, immobility*

It is somewhat comical though.

I think people wonder about my sanity.

Things in STL are still moving slowly.

But my outlook on it all has been better this week.

Papa has a phone interview coming up.

Hopefully that turns into something.

Tomorrow marks one month since our move.

And Tuesday we get into our apartment.

Finally have some things figured out for your birth.

I will meet some of the midwives for the birthing center on Thursday.

I'm excited for you to arrive. 

And getting to the point of being 

SO OVER PREGNANCY.

I just want to meet you.

I want to see your little face.

Get to know your personality.

I love you...but I don't know you.

I'm ready to start getting to know you.

But come on your time.

And Grow Strong Micaiah James.

Patience, Cousins, and a Name.

Hey there baby boy,

Well papa and I have moved. 

And we continue to wait.

This move has been filled with fear for me.

Yet confirmation in the need to be here. 

But we still need a job for papa.

and a home.

and insurance.

and a lot of little things.

But we know God can provide.
And we will wait on his timing.
And continue to pursue the things we know he wants from us.

On Monday, we found out that your new cousin is a BOY!

Another boy in the Wiedeman clan!

You two will be buds I hope.

While we were in Chicago visiting family for the 4th
we decided to reveal your name.

We weren't going to let people know it...

but we love it and you.

And now the rest of the family knows.

So now we can call you by your name.

And in 9 weeks we will see your face.
The funniest part of all was when papa and I decided on Micaiah James
we had no idea that your grandpa had wanted to name dad's sisters that if they had been boys.
So Auntie Sabriah or Adriel would have been Micaiah if they were boys.
Haha. I guess you get to be the lucky one.
Your name means, "Who is like Yahweh?"
And your middle name is your great grandfather's name.

I can not wait to meet you.
And see the face that goes with this name.
Grow Strong Micaiah.

We just might be crazy

Oh my Lanta!

2 weeks. 

In two weeks we are moving.

That's assuming we can get our stuff together to get out of here.

Anyone want to help the preggo pack?

So for some reason we feel called (back for me) to St. Louis.

Who knew?

And though there is still no job in sight,
we are taking it by faith.

Which means my agenda is growing and my motivation is fading.

Like right now I need to apply for medicaid.

Because I no longer have insurance for prenatal visits as of next week.

And we need to figure out how we're transporting all of our belongings to good ole MO.

I told my physician that we're leaving but apparently not having a Dr. to send medical records to costs a whole lot more. 

That's another thing. I need to find a doctor there.

Once I get insurance again.

For housing we have a temporary home with my brother and sister in law.

But then its house/apartment hunting.

Then setting up a nursery for the little one.
And continuing the job hunt for husband.

Oh and did I mention I just found out I'm anemic?

Fortunately it came with the good new of not having gestational diabetes.

And it's apparently manageable with iron pills and supplements

if I can keep those down.

Strangely I'm excited about this all.

Overwhelmed, but excited.

Maybe I'm still just hyper from the glucose sugar drink I had to down this morning. 

NASTY.

Ah yes back to my list.

Need to cancel our water for the end of the month. 

Cancel our internet.

Find a storage unit to house our stuff until we have a permanent(or semi-permanent) residence.

Call the land lords to let them know a move out date.

And I should probably let our families know that we've made this huge decision.

Eh...they'll read it here lol. 

Too much to do.

We've only lived here since December but I'm pretty sure we have more than we need.

Or perhaps just more than I am willing to move and take with us.

Anyone want to buy a desk?

Or a funky looking green leather couch?

I'm ready though. 

For this adventure with Hubs, and baby.

For the biggest test of reliance on the Lord's provision I will have gone through to date.

So ready or not St. Louis....Here we Come!

Little....Baby Fever

Hey there baby boy,

Perhaps my definition of baby fever is a little..off

but I think I have baby fever.

No I am not thinking about of more babies.

Not right now anyway.

But I increasing in impatience in my wait to meet you.

I know that mommyhood is not all cuddles

and it's a lot of hard work

but I just can't wait to get started. 

And see who you become.

And well I'm pretty darn excited for the snuggles too.

Mom has 2 days left of work

And today some of her coworkers got you a gift.

A cutie blanket toy

Some itsy bitsy socks

and diapers :)

I feel like I get spoiled with all the gifts for you.

I can't wait to know where we will live when you get here.

Then I can start really making plans for you.

Grow strong baby.

And don't let my impatience sway you to arrive too soon.

We'll meet you soon.

Much love,

Mum

Little....The Sky Is Falling

Hey there baby boy,

So you don't know the story of Chicken Little

So this title doesn't make much sense yet

But it's reflective of how I'm feeling these days.

Chicken little overreacts to his situation and 

ultimately determines that the sky is falling and the world is ending.

I tend to be over dramatic.

Right now the little troubles feel like the sky is falling.
On Friday momma told her current job she would not be returning next year
even though neither mom or dad have jobs lined up.
That was scary.
But we feel pretty confident that the Lord is going to
do something with us in a different region than little ole Hoopeston.
Right now we will be moving at the end of June.
To where?
We do not know.
So we are trusting the Lord for that as well.
All this trusting is difficult.
And I often feel like the sky is falling.
What happens if we don't find jobs?
How do we pay back the mountain of debt?
How is maternity leave going to affect us?
What if I chose to go back to work?
What if I chose to stay at home?
It's all a little scary and overwhelming.
But I have to remember that God's plan is perfect.
My plan is not.
The plan we had to wait a year for you....
Well I'm incredibly glad that didn't work out.
I love you little man and can't imagine life with out you
even though you have yet to make an appearance.
I can't imagine if papa hadn't asked me that 3rd time for a date.
But it wasn't in my plan.
Pretty much nothing in my life has gone exactly as I planned.
Yet I'm surprised and fret every time things change.
Right now we are praying for direction.
We think that is St. Louis.
I hesitate in saying that because I don't want to
misinterpret the Lord's plan.
Also I hate being wrong.
But it just feels like home to us.
Even though we aren't there.
So that's what we are blinding pursuing.
As everything seeming crumbles around us.
We will pursue Jesus.
And do our best to listen.
Though I rarely ever do.
Thank goodness for grace.
So the sky isn't falling and we're really okay.
But know that mom and dad pretty much never "have it together".
But we do trust in Jesus, so you'll be taken care of.
Love you little.
Grow Strong.

Little.....Punching Bag

Hey there baby boy.

So this week and last have been an adventure in mommyhood.

You have been quite the active fellow.

I pretty much feel you everyday.

I'm also quite sure I've become your punching/kicking bag.

I'm usually alright with that....

Unless you take out your energy on my bladder.

That I am not the biggest fan of.

Who knew pregnancy literally turned you back into a baby.

I mean I whine because of the discomfort(only to papa, usually)

And I take overly frequent bathroom trips

I am much more picky due to food aversions

I burp and belch with no qualms at all.

My nose runs all over the place

I've pretty much turned into a giant kid here.

No one told me this stuff.

And so as weird as it may be to write about it

I do it because NO ONE TOLD ME THIS STUFF!

Who knew I'd be sick and whiney all the time.

And cravings...I don't really have them

I just crave food.

All the time. 

And usually I succumb to the cravings.

You'd think I'd have ballooned up by now.

Surprisingly not, but you still surprise me with a weekly vomit

So maybe that is the reason.

My belly is getting big.

Again you'd think I had put on more than 5lbs at this point.

But that....I will NOT complain about.

Dr. said you are doing well. 

Your Ultrasound came back GREAT!

You are pretty much perfect. 

Growth on target.

Healthy heart.

And really strong legs and arms, which you use to jab me.

And as of yesterday Papa!

I'm so glad he finally got to feel you.

So I guess I shouldn't complain when you send me running out of a meeting for the bathroom.

Because it all just means I get a wonderful you at the end of this.

My healthy baby boy.

Grow Strong.